DAY 1
About a month ago, my friend Courtney convinced me (quite easily) to take a sailing class with her in July. "We will be learning how to sail our own sailboats!" She said, getting more and more excited. This thought only scared me a little bit, as I thought about manning a whole huge sailboat by myself... I just KNOW I will run it aground, or get tangled in all the ropes, or hit a wave and drop my beer in the water! But then she went on to explain to me that there are different sizes of sail boats, and we would be learning to sail small, single/double person boats. Phew! I'm in!
Last night was our first class. Courtney and I met up with the group at the Willamette Sailing Club, south of downtown on the river (of course). After grabbing a lifejacket, we were all ushered into a floating classroom right off of the dock to learn about what we were going to be doing for the next few weeks. Though I tried to follow along, I found myself starting to space out as the instructors continued to use a bucket-full of words that, beyond starboard and port, I could barely keep up with: tack, jib, windward, beam reach, gybing, boom, luffing, etc. Ahh!
I focused really hard on figuring out what these words meant and their connection to the whole process of sailing, but really the one lesson I took away from the discussion was DON'T SAIL INTO THE WIND. "If you sail into the wind," one instructor explained, "you will get stuck, and you could be stuck there for a long time. There is a way to get out of it, but it's tricky. You can only steer with the rudder when your boat is in motion, and if you sail into the wind, you will stop; your sail will lose the wind and just flutter around... this is what we call luffing." Got it. Stay AWAY from direct wind.
So if you want to sail towards the wind, you have to do this complicated sort of zig-zag line of attack. I think it's called tacking. Even on the powerpoint diagrams, it looked pretty tricky. "You will be able to do all of this when you are done with this class." The instructor assured us. I really hope so. God, I can just see it now: Instructor! I sailed into the wind, like you told me not to! I forgot to zig and zag! Help me! Then I fall into the water. Let's hope not.
After we listened to this lecture, we had to do a swim test. "You will swim from one side of the dock to the other, and when you get to the other side, you have to show us that you can put on a life-jacket in the water. To get your life-jacket, you have to tell a joke." What?! A joke?! I'm horrible at jokes! The instructor is still talking, "...take your shoes..." Oh I remember a joke, What is brown and sticky? A stick! Ha ha ha, that's funny, but what was that one Cassy was telling me? "...on the dock..." It was such a good joke... Oh! I remember! Yes! "...capsize the boat..." What?!
We all start walking towards the door and someone asks me, "Did you hear what we are supposed to do now?"
"No, I was trying to figure out a joke." I said. Great. I will just follow what everyone else does.
We follow everyone outside to the dock and watch as three people at a time jump into the water and swim the length of the dock, tell some jokes, then put on their life-jackets and get out of the water. Courtney and I jump in together and swim down the dock. "Courtney, you are going to be the butt of my joke." I tell her. "What?" She asks, but it's too late.
"Courtney! Why did the chicken cross the road?"
"I don't know!" she says, swimming beside me.
"To get to the skanky bitches house. Knock knock!" I ask, and she looks confused but says appropriately, "Who's there?"
"It's the chicken."
Ha ha ha! I laugh, she thinks for a second and then laughs, everyone else laughs, and we both get our life jackets. You are welcome, Courtney!
We then walk over to the other dock where a sail boat has been taken out for us to play on. Two people at a time get in the boat, capsize it (lean over the same side and knock it all the way sideways into the water), then get it back upright. One person holds on to the side of the boat as the other one goes around the back and pushes the center-thingy back down into the water, righting the boat and taking the other person with it. Then they go around back and get back in the boat with the help of the other person. Courtney and I do this pretty successfully, and I am surprised that I can push a whole boat back into the water (these boats only weigh 230 pounds). After we are done, we get out and cheer on everyone else while they do the same thing. There are about 12 people in the class: 4 women and 8 men. They all seem pretty laid back and I think we are going to have a lot of fun!
After capsizing our boat, we take it out of the water and the instructors show us how to put up the sails. This is another complicated task of lining up the right side of the sails, pulling on lots of ropes and pulleys and tightening things and knotting things. After we watch the instructors do it once, they have us do it on another boat. As there are 12 of us, I mostly hang back and let the other people take care of it, but the one thing I contributed was to pull up the main sail by a rope. All I could think of was "you can raise MY main sail," and I giggled to myself a little bit and then sincerely hoped that no one would ever use that pick-up line on me.
We eventually, with some help from the instructors, were successful at raising both the sails (the main sail and the jib, the smaller sail). We clapped again, congratulating ourselves, then went back over to the classroom and sat outside on some picnic tables to learn how to tie some knots while a couple people went one at a time with an instructor out into the boats for their first hands-on sailing lesson. All we had to do on the boat was control the jib (the little sail) and make sure we didn't get smacked in the head by the boom (the bottom of the main sail). Look at that! I know some words already.
Too soon, the class was over. Our next class is tomorrow and I am pretty excited! I never thought I'd be taking a sailing class, but you know what, I am young and I am free, and also, why not? You never know when you will need to escape into the ocean from a land threat and have to sail a boat. You also never know when someone will ask you to join a Yacht club. I will be prepared for both.
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Motivation Magic
This is a post about exercise. And if you know me, you might laugh, because I would seem to be the last person who would write about this particular topic. But something magical happened this morning and I want to share it with you.
This morning, I weighed 129.6 pounds.
YES, it is true! I don't remember the last time I weighed under 130 pounds and this morning when I stepped on that white box of doom, waited for the little red lights to stop blinking and judging me, and saw that number, my jaw dropped and my eyes grew wide in wonder and disbelief. I think I whispered, "Shit."
And do you want to know the trick to my success? Are you ready? Lean in close, it's a doozy:
I drank less, I ate healthier, and I worked out more.
WHOA.
Now, as simple as that seems, as many people know it is easier said than done. The most difficult part about doing all that crap is having the motivation to actually DO it. For me, my motivation was Hawaii.
But you know, I've said that before. I've used Hawaii and Lake Shasta as motivation to try and look hot in a bikini, but what is making this time even more motivational? I blame Yesica. My co-worker, Yesica, is a health freak. She has been making up challenges each month and is creating a little following of people who do exactly what she tells them to do... isn't that the definition of a cult? Then she rewards the winner with a prize of her choosing.
"How do you win?" you may be asking. Simple. The other thing she is making us do is take our measurements and a before/after photo. The measurements are as follows: Bust, Under Bust, Waist, Belly Button, Hips, Butt, and Thigh. Whoever loses the most inches in these measurements at the end of the month WINS. Which is really the best way to decide whether we are getting the results we want... weighing ourselves is a little bit deceptive with all the fat/muscle weight differences.
Anyways, she says, "For June, you will jump rope for 20 minutes 5 times a week!" and we do it. "For July, you will do 10 minutes of jump roping and then 5 minutes of burpees three times a week! AND you will make a healthy choice in your diet at least once a day!" And we do it. Yes, master. As you command.
For June, I didn't do so hot. It was a birthday month and so my eating and drinking routines were out of control. I only lost 1.5 inches in my waist. Bummer.
But my sister CASSY, on the other hand, kicked some ASS. Cassy, I believe, lost at least three inches in her belly button and a decent amount everywhere else. Cassy had mono for a month before she started working out and couldn't exercise the whole time, so she started at zero. Cassy eats super healthy. Cassy never drinks. Cassy was doing two workouts a day because she is in Hawaii with my mom and probably doesn't have many friends yet. Cassy wants a beach bod because that is where she is living all summer. I want to say Cassy cheated because she was doing so many extra workouts on top of the jump roping, but I can't call it cheating when she got such amazing results and worked so hard for it. Cassy deserves the hot body she now has to show off to all of Oah'u. Cassy rocks.
And we are back to what is currently motivating me to get into shape: her before and after pictures and how hard she beat me at that last challenge... she ended up winning! Also, I saw Gwyneth Paltrow's abs in the new Iron Man movie, and that's pretty motivating as well; I stared in jealousy at her stomach and immediately started doing crunches right there in the movie theater.
But back to Cassy. I am going to visit her and my mom in Hawaii in 15 days. And I do NOT want to be all flabby and goopy while laying next to her at the beach... that's just not right. So I have been drinking less (only 1 or 2 beers a day!), eating better ("Let's do a week challenge. You can't have any wheat this week." Yesica told me... so of course I'm doing it), and exercising more. This month, I promised myself, I am getting RESULTS.
This month is the burpee challenge. I fucking hate the burpee challenge. Like I said before, 10 minutes of jump roping and 5 minutes of as many burpees as you can. So far I've done it three times and I'm at 46. And EVERY TIME I do the push-up part of it, I think, "I HATE YOU YESICA!" When it's over and I collapse on the grass and sound like a dying cat trying to breathe it's last breath. But after a few minutes, when my breathing has returned to a somewhat normal state and my face is only a little pink rather than a glowing red, I think, "YESSSSS. I kicked your ass, burpees, and you will make mine look awesome!" Then I go do some ab workouts because once you start, it's hard to stop.
So that is the goal this month. I leave for Hawaii on July 24th, and today is the 9th. Finding the motivation is the hardest part of working out... whenever I pause before pressing the timer, wondering whether I actually NEED to do this workout, I think of Cassy and Gwyneth Paltrow and the beach, and think, YES, DO IT YOU PANSY. So I do.
So find your motivation! And stop eating so much crap!
This morning, I weighed 129.6 pounds.
YES, it is true! I don't remember the last time I weighed under 130 pounds and this morning when I stepped on that white box of doom, waited for the little red lights to stop blinking and judging me, and saw that number, my jaw dropped and my eyes grew wide in wonder and disbelief. I think I whispered, "Shit."
And do you want to know the trick to my success? Are you ready? Lean in close, it's a doozy:
I drank less, I ate healthier, and I worked out more.
WHOA.
Now, as simple as that seems, as many people know it is easier said than done. The most difficult part about doing all that crap is having the motivation to actually DO it. For me, my motivation was Hawaii.
But you know, I've said that before. I've used Hawaii and Lake Shasta as motivation to try and look hot in a bikini, but what is making this time even more motivational? I blame Yesica. My co-worker, Yesica, is a health freak. She has been making up challenges each month and is creating a little following of people who do exactly what she tells them to do... isn't that the definition of a cult? Then she rewards the winner with a prize of her choosing.
"How do you win?" you may be asking. Simple. The other thing she is making us do is take our measurements and a before/after photo. The measurements are as follows: Bust, Under Bust, Waist, Belly Button, Hips, Butt, and Thigh. Whoever loses the most inches in these measurements at the end of the month WINS. Which is really the best way to decide whether we are getting the results we want... weighing ourselves is a little bit deceptive with all the fat/muscle weight differences.
Anyways, she says, "For June, you will jump rope for 20 minutes 5 times a week!" and we do it. "For July, you will do 10 minutes of jump roping and then 5 minutes of burpees three times a week! AND you will make a healthy choice in your diet at least once a day!" And we do it. Yes, master. As you command.
For June, I didn't do so hot. It was a birthday month and so my eating and drinking routines were out of control. I only lost 1.5 inches in my waist. Bummer.
But my sister CASSY, on the other hand, kicked some ASS. Cassy, I believe, lost at least three inches in her belly button and a decent amount everywhere else. Cassy had mono for a month before she started working out and couldn't exercise the whole time, so she started at zero. Cassy eats super healthy. Cassy never drinks. Cassy was doing two workouts a day because she is in Hawaii with my mom and probably doesn't have many friends yet. Cassy wants a beach bod because that is where she is living all summer. I want to say Cassy cheated because she was doing so many extra workouts on top of the jump roping, but I can't call it cheating when she got such amazing results and worked so hard for it. Cassy deserves the hot body she now has to show off to all of Oah'u. Cassy rocks.
And we are back to what is currently motivating me to get into shape: her before and after pictures and how hard she beat me at that last challenge... she ended up winning! Also, I saw Gwyneth Paltrow's abs in the new Iron Man movie, and that's pretty motivating as well; I stared in jealousy at her stomach and immediately started doing crunches right there in the movie theater.
But back to Cassy. I am going to visit her and my mom in Hawaii in 15 days. And I do NOT want to be all flabby and goopy while laying next to her at the beach... that's just not right. So I have been drinking less (only 1 or 2 beers a day!), eating better ("Let's do a week challenge. You can't have any wheat this week." Yesica told me... so of course I'm doing it), and exercising more. This month, I promised myself, I am getting RESULTS.
This month is the burpee challenge. I fucking hate the burpee challenge. Like I said before, 10 minutes of jump roping and 5 minutes of as many burpees as you can. So far I've done it three times and I'm at 46. And EVERY TIME I do the push-up part of it, I think, "I HATE YOU YESICA!" When it's over and I collapse on the grass and sound like a dying cat trying to breathe it's last breath. But after a few minutes, when my breathing has returned to a somewhat normal state and my face is only a little pink rather than a glowing red, I think, "YESSSSS. I kicked your ass, burpees, and you will make mine look awesome!" Then I go do some ab workouts because once you start, it's hard to stop.
So that is the goal this month. I leave for Hawaii on July 24th, and today is the 9th. Finding the motivation is the hardest part of working out... whenever I pause before pressing the timer, wondering whether I actually NEED to do this workout, I think of Cassy and Gwyneth Paltrow and the beach, and think, YES, DO IT YOU PANSY. So I do.
So find your motivation! And stop eating so much crap!
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